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Totally feel your pain. A couple years ago I had to put my 15 1/2 year old cat to sleep. I took her in because I knew something was off as she wouldn't stop meowing the night before and she kept begging for wet food no matter how much I fed her. I already knew she had kidney problems and that was the cause of a lot of her barfing and runny poop. So I took her in on Monday and it was confirmed, she was in renal/kidney failure. The vet thought it was strange she kept begging for wet food though but perhaps thought it was maybe Cat Alzheimer. She couldn't remember she ate. So the next morning I went in and had her put down. I was there with her and cried the whole time. She's now buried in my parent's backyard.

I still have my other cat and I love her to death but I still miss this one. It's hard. She was dumb as rocks sometimes but a very loving cat who always loved attention. She was a lap kitty. Never clawed or scratched and never bit you. If it ever happened, it was done by accident. The one I have now, she's so skittish and you move ever so slightly sometimes and she jumps and you'll probably get scratched in the process, and that's with her just laying next to you.