Smallville78 wrote:
was he distant before the baby, i mean was he checked out ETC. i agree go see a lawyer and have them speak to him or something and have it set up where he pays for child support ETC

Yes exactly.  Even if you both agree on support and custody and visitation it is best to have it in writing verified by a lawyer so if things turn sour you are covered.  This will also allow you to set up spousal support since you are currently unemployed

I also suggest you go to therapy.  I know you said he wouldn't but even going alone might help you.