FallenAngelFound wrote:
NsYnC FaN 364 wrote:


Jack may or may not have done what Mary says, and that's wrong if he did, but Mary had no business spreading rumors and gossip about it to anyone else. And as Jack's friend, OP should say something. It's bad behavior. But everyone wants to just "stay out of it" or turn the other cheek to it. I just don't get the cowardice.

I think in a perfect world, the OP would go and tell Jack what Mary told her. In a perfect world Jack wouldn't overreact and possibly lash out at the OP for believing such a thing, and in a perfect world Jack wouldn't run to Mary and ream her out for spreading "false" or "true but incredibly unflattering" things about him to his friend the OP, in turn setting Mary on war path against the OP.

Basically, yes if people were perfect and could handle their emotions and were all mature and level headed all the time, in all situations, then doing what you suggest would be perfectly OK but reality will probably be something more along the lines of what I described above.

To me personally, I'd rather take what Mary says with a grain of salt until I, myself, had concrete proof that Jack is in fact a racist ass, rather then going to Jack and possibly starting a very nasty 3 way war between co-workers that could very well end up involved several more co-workers, and in turn could make for quite an unpleasant work environment.

Not to mention, accusing or even just suggesting, that someone is racist, is a weighty accusation. I would be careful, as you could easily ruin an innocent person's reputation with false or inaccurate accusations.