I'm having problems at work with my manager. Advice please
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JCPC42 |
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Posts: 5185 (07/05/2009 2:07 AM) |
^^ Well, then sorry for saying that, because that's not true. I just typed it, spur of the moment.
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FallenAngelFound |
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Posts: 1955 (07/05/2009 2:13 AM) |
JCPC42 wrote:If you KNOW it's your perception and not her "attitude", then STOP NOW. Saying things like "infer" and "imply" means that you know what she was MEANING or TRYING to say, and you don't. You're leaping a country mile with your assumptions, and I think you're WAY off base here. You look like a lunatic for even suggesting such things, honestly. Big deal if you don't like being questioned about it. I'm serious. And if you DO work well, then you should have NO issue with being questioned, because there would be no room for criticism, period. It would be "Did you remember to tell that table that we no longer offer free refills on that beverage, Katie?" "Why, yes, Mona, I did. I'm glad you asked though, because that would have been uncomfortable if there was a miscommunication about that!" And I don't think that you just want to report her to get her into trouble- I think you just want to report her because you don't like confrontation or conflict and will do anything you can to avoid handling this yourself. Which is true. Knowing that it's not the right job for you is even more reason to not expect things like for others to treat you with kid gloves. And I hate to burst your bubble, but it doesn't matter where you work or for how long, chances are NO ONE will give a rat's ass about you or your contribution. That's life. You're a nameless, faceless minion making someone else money. As far as how she is handling it- there are probably far better ways to deal with someone like you. But she's a MANAGER AT DENNY'S. Her life isn't exactly peaches and cream, and that's just knowing her job. Like I said, if you feel she is rude and isn't handling things well, there are a myriad of ways to handle that maturely and productively, and none of them involve being "kind of bitchy" to her, showing how "overwhelmed" you are while you're at work, talking about this with other coworkers behind her back, or trying to write a letter to corporate to have them intervene. Oh, and p.s. If it's a franchise, corporate won't give two shits unless she's a racist sexual harasser who spits in customers' food. And even then, it's Denny's, so...
Edited By: FallenAngelFound
07/05/2009 2:16 AM.
Edited 1 times.
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shazam69 |
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Posts: 7776 (07/05/2009 2:15 AM) |
JCPC42 wrote: |
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FallenAngelFound |
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Posts: 1956 (07/05/2009 2:18 AM) |
Word, shazam. WORD.
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Ho |
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Posts: 1159 (07/05/2009 2:39 AM) |
wtf at all of the essays in here.
I hate women managers for this reason. 99% of them are complete assholes for no reason. The note is only going to backfire. It makes you look like a weak server. If you feel the situation is that bad, you need to find out who is above her and talk to them one on one. Don't write anything because it will only be handed over to her. |
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IMJinnie |
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Posts: 429 (07/05/2009 3:12 AM) |
What's with the massive use of quotation marks for single words? It just looks like sarcasm. Frankly, I don't think the attitude issues are one-sided
here.
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taniaoakley |
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Posts: 3491 (07/05/2009 4:35 AM) |
Good god. DO NOT write a letter. It is only going to hurt you. Everything you have said looks petty.
Listen to what the people in this thread are telling you. This stuff is going to happen in every job you ever have for the rest of your life. It's not going to magically end when you stop being a server. Take a good hard look at yourself and see just how many assumptions you've made. You sound insecure and slightly paranoid. You're attaching far too much importance to the small stuff. If you really want your work situation to improve. Go see your manager and apologise for your attitude. Even if you don't think you had one. Ask her if there is anything specific that she thinks you could do differently. Give her a reason to stop being nasty to you (not that I think she was, she just sounds like a tough manager). Take this as good practice for growing a thicker skin. You're going to need it in life. |
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XOctoberMoonX |
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Posts: 2594 (07/05/2009 4:41 AM) |
I agree with taniaoakley. Every thing you said does sound petty. I cannot imagine if you worked for my boss. She will rub it in over and over and over if you
do something wrong. I always nod and agree with her if I did do something wrong and let her know it won't happen again, or I stand up for myself and
explain why I did what I did and why I thought it was right. She does it to everyone, even other managers...but we all realize it's her personality and
KNOW not to take it personal.
Sounds like what you need to do with your manager. Adjust you attitude and realize that managers will not change the way they manage because you are sensitive. Learn to take criticism, you will get it from every boss or manager. Don't just brush it off as them being hard on you...really consider what they are saying. Use it to better yourself, because a lot of times people see us in a way we don't see ourselves. If someone is telling you you're moody...don't just brush it off. Ask yourself why they said what they did.
Edited By: XOctoberMoonX
07/05/2009 4:48 AM.
Edited 2 times.
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grayspeckledgoose |
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Posts: 15080 (07/05/2009 5:30 AM) |
Is this a long-term job you want to keep? Do you plan on working at Denny's, after you're done with school? If not, just do your job to the best of
your abilities, and try not to clash with her anymore. If this job is just a gig to help pay bills as you're going through school, I wouldn't bother
with going to management about these issues you're having. It's not worth it.
I agree with everybody that has said, it sounds like you and Mona have clashing personalities, and you simply do not get along. That's life. It happens. The impression I get, is that you're trying to find knit-picky things to battle/fight about. I do not know how the restaurant business works....it seems to me that issues such as her giving away one of your tables to another waitress because of a mistake you made, her getting mad about the free refill thing, and some of her comments (the "no talking is o.k." thing) seem very minimal, and NOT worthy of a letter to upper management. It's not her fault that you are sensitive and emotional.... You said "it's easier to stay in the same place until I graduate college. And it sucks, when, after working there for so long, they still don't care about you." Again, that's life. Being a server at Denny's is an entry-level job. They could get rid of you, and turn around and hire somebody else to replace you in little to no time. So, why would they care about you? I am not trying to be mean...just stating my thoughts.
Edited By: grayspeckledgoose
07/05/2009 5:35 AM.
Edited 1 times.
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daisy bouquet |
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Posts: 1417 (07/05/2009 9:25 AM) |
Dont write a letter - its petty. And I have to agree with the others that the problem isnt all her fault. Its a college job, so suck it up and deal. Its just
the first of the bad bosses and awful co-workers you are going to have.
And please tell me you are not an English major. That letter is in no way something you should be writing in a professional environment.
Edited By: daisy bouquet
07/05/2009 9:28 AM.
Edited 1 times.
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Jaime04 |
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Posts: 2502 (07/05/2009 10:14 AM) |
All this over a job at Denny's?
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AudaciousAudrey |
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Posts: 27318 (07/05/2009 12:52 PM) Biggest Know It All '09
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LMFAO
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MeParley |
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Posts: 15048 (07/05/2009 1:21 PM) |
I agree with what others are saying. If Denny's isn't your intended place of employment after you finish college, then you should just suck it up and
keep quiet and do your job as well as you can.
Sad, but true, there are lots of people in managerial postions who are assholes and who aren't good at dealing with people. But the higher-ups in the company will always back them up. You aren't going to win this one and it will make you look bad. The best thing to do with terrible customers or terrible managers is to kill them with kindness. Be super polite and pleasant and don't let it show if something bothers you. Just act like everything is great and it will make you look good and drive the manager crazy. Believe it or not, it can be a fun game to play and it really works. |
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Toast is good |
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Posts: 2486 (07/05/2009 1:38 PM) |
I love that I've gotten to use that emoticon twice today. I agree and applaud Fallen and Shazam. |
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