Boy advice please..

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hipsnhearts	Boy advice please..	Lead	[-]
Posts: 2848 (05/31/2009 10:43 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	So I'm dating this guy, and I like him a lot and we've been hanging out for about a month and a half now. We have not title or anything like that but normally I suck at liking someone for more than a short length of time because I'm really picky, however, I can't find any reason to get rid of this guy. Anyway, we were talking the other night and I told him that I really liked him.. and he said something like "You can like me all you want. Just don't love me or anything." I told him I didn't really know how to respond to that, but he said he was just broken, and needed about 5 years. (he just got out of a 5 year relationship a few months ago, and she also slept with his best friend.) So I don't know what to do. Obviously I'm not going to be able date this guy and not have my feelings progress, and I don't want to end up getting hurt. Or should I just see how things go, and maybe he'll come around. Ugh. This sucks.. I always pick the wrong guys.
shoebaby1		#1	[-]
Posts: 27117 (05/31/2009 10:44 PM) Most Dramatic JJBer '08 Most Likely to be Online '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Get rid of his ass, did you sleep with him?...he sounds like a real loser.
KristinWasBanned		#2	[-]
Posts: 1200 (05/31/2009 10:47 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I think you just found a reason to get rid of him.
hipsnhearts		#3	[-]
Posts: 2849 (05/31/2009 10:47 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	No, we haven't slept together. That's the thing though, he's really not an ass, he's a really nice guy. He's just had a rough time with his last relationship because he needs time. I guess getting out now is probably the best before I get too involved.
theNavigator		#4	[-]
Posts: 360 (05/31/2009 10:52 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Please don't invest any more into this. You'll regret it. Just trying to look out for you while you are still not full into it. I'm going through my worst nightmares right now sort of. He was with someone for awhile before me.. we've been together a year and a half but just yeah.
shoebaby1		#5	[-]
Posts: 27119 (05/31/2009 10:53 PM) Most Dramatic JJBer '08 Most Likely to be Online '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	So he knows he needs exactly 5 years to get over a 5 year relationship. Yeah freaking right, he's full of shit. sorry
thedon03		#6	[-]
Posts: 13635 (05/31/2009 10:54 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	hipsnhearts wrote: So I'm dating this guy, and I like him a lot and we've been hanging out for about a month and a half now. We have not title or anything like that but normally I suck at liking someone for more than a short length of time because I'm really picky, however, I can't find any reason to get rid of this guy. Anyway, we were talking the other night and I told him that I really liked him.. and he said something like "You can like me all you want. Just don't love me or anything." I told him I didn't really know how to respond to that, but he said he was just broken, and needed about 5 years. (he just got out of a 5 year relationship a few months ago, and she also slept with his best friend.) So I don't know what to do. Obviously I'm not going to be able date this guy and not have my feelings progress, and I don't want to end up getting hurt. Or should I just see how things go, and maybe he'll come around. Ugh. This sucks.. I always pick the wrong guys. That just sounds like a really jerk-y thing to say. Did he tell you he wanted a casual relationship from the beginning? Depending on what you want out of the relationship, being with him may just be asking for trouble.
seaner23		#7	[-]
Posts: 10402 (05/31/2009 10:55 PM) Best Male '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	sounds like he's just not ready to be "serious" at this point. that's not a bad thing though. if you like him, go ahead and keep seeing him. dude just got out of a 5 year relationship, he's probably not ready for the whole "i love you" thing right now.
shoebaby1		#8	[-]
Posts: 27120 (05/31/2009 10:56 PM) Most Dramatic JJBer '08 Most Likely to be Online '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	seaner23 wrote: sounds like he's just not ready to be "serious" at this point. that's not a bad thing though. if you like him, go ahead and keep seeing him. dude just got out of a 5 year relationship, he's probably not ready for the whole "i love you" thing right now. Yeah I guess you're right.
hipsnhearts		#9	[-]
Posts: 2850 (05/31/2009 10:58 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I'm sure he doesn't know he needs exactly 5 years.. basically he was just saying he's not ready for anything serious. I'm not trying to make him out to be a jerk or anything in this situation.. he's just being honest. I'm just trying to figure out what I should do given the information he's given me. Which obviously should be to let it go.. it's just going to be so hard b/c I really like him, but oh well. Better now than later I guess.
AudaciousAudrey		#10	[-]
Posts: 26294 (05/31/2009 10:58 PM) Biggest Know It All '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I would probably leave him but I'm really impatient.
shoebaby1		#11	[-]
Posts: 27121 (05/31/2009 10:59 PM) Most Dramatic JJBer '08 Most Likely to be Online '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	AudaciousAudrey wrote: I would probably leave him but I'm really impatient. Yeah me too, don't listen to me....
hipsnhearts		#12	[-]
Posts: 2851 (05/31/2009 11:01 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	seaner23 wrote: sounds like he's just not ready to be "serious" at this point. that's not a bad thing though. if you like him, go ahead and keep seeing him. dude just got out of a 5 year relationship, he's probably not ready for the whole "i love you" thing right now. I agree. I would like to keep seeing him, it's just hard he basically said don't fall in love with me. I like him more and more every time we hang out and it just seems kind of pointless if it's not going to be able to progress.
seaner23		#13	[-]
Posts: 10403 (05/31/2009 11:07 PM) Best Male '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	hipsnhearts wrote: seaner23 wrote: sounds like he's just not ready to be "serious" at this point. that's not a bad thing though. if you like him, go ahead and keep seeing him. dude just got out of a 5 year relationship, he's probably not ready for the whole "i love you" thing right now. I agree. I would like to keep seeing him, it's just hard he basically said don't fall in love with me. I like him more and more every time we hang out and it just seems kind of pointless if it's not going to be able to progress. but who knows? maybe he's not ready today...but maybe he'll be ready tomorrow, maybe in 3 months, maybe in 6 months, maybe never? at this point, unless you've got a "better" guy lined up i see no harm in continuing to see him. his girl did him really dirty and he's probably not ready to trust a new girl right away. give him some time, be the best girlfriend you can be and see where it leads.
hipsnhearts		#14	[-]
Posts: 2853 (05/31/2009 11:10 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	seaner23 wrote: hipsnhearts wrote: seaner23 wrote: sounds like he's just not ready to be "serious" at this point. that's not a bad thing though. if you like him, go ahead and keep seeing him. dude just got out of a 5 year relationship, he's probably not ready for the whole "i love you" thing right now. I agree. I would like to keep seeing him, it's just hard he basically said don't fall in love with me. I like him more and more every time we hang out and it just seems kind of pointless if it's not going to be able to progress. but who knows? maybe he's not ready today...but maybe he'll be ready tomorrow, maybe in 3 months, maybe in 6 months, maybe never? at this point, unless you've got a "better" guy lined up i see no harm in continuing to see him. his girl did him really dirty and he's probably not ready to trust a new girl right away. give him some time, be the best girlfriend you can be and see where it leads. Perhaps that's what I'll do then.. I'm not quite ready to give up on him yet.
Da SupaStar BL		#15	[-]
Posts: 714 (05/31/2009 11:17 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Dont be the rebound.
lilSS		#16	[-]
Posts: 11809 (05/31/2009 11:18 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	you definitely found a reason to get rid of him. Dont date emotionally unavailable men.
thedon03		#17	[-]
Posts: 13636 (05/31/2009 11:19 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Da SupaStar BL wrote: Dont be the rebound. Yep. I would never date anyone just getting out of a 5 yr relationship if I was possibly looking for it to go somewhere.
seaner23		#18	[-]
Posts: 10405 (05/31/2009 11:24 PM) Best Male '09 Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	so y'all would really get rid of a nice guy that you really like a bunch because he's not ready to be serious after a month and a half?
xXJellyxBellyXx		#19	[-]
Posts: 262 (05/31/2009 11:27 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	lilSS wrote: you definitely found a reason to get rid of him. Dont date emotionally unavailable men.
lilSS		#20	[-]
Posts: 11813 (05/31/2009 11:46 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Seaner, its not about his not being ready to commit after a month and a half. I personally refuse to put a label on anything until we have surpassed the 3 month mark. When a guy is telling you in a lot of words that he doesnt want you, you walk away. Op clearly wants to be in a relationship and if he doesnt which is usually code for his just not wanting her, she needs to walk away.

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