i got a call last night from my co-workers wife

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mshinda		#181	[-]
Posts: 3097 (06/13/2008 4:29 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Ninido wrote: But going and trying to hang out w/ a married coworker, just the two of you, is shady no matter how innocent you wanna try to play it off as. Disagree. I was the married one in one case, and had a good male friend co-worker -- whom my husband met and knew all about -- and we went to lunch together, some work-related events (we work in a very social industry) after work and once went for a drink after work, wherein my husband picked me up from the bar and he and dude said hey and chatted. That is what it looks like when it's innocent. No secrecy, no clandestine shit.
gapprncess		#182	[-]
Posts: 17233 (06/13/2008 4:31 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	mshinda wrote: Ninido wrote: But going and trying to hang out w/ a married coworker, just the two of you, is shady no matter how innocent you wanna try to play it off as. Disagree. I was the married one in one case, and had a good male friend co-worker -- whom my husband met and knew all about -- and we went to lunch together, some work-related events (we work in a very social industry) after work and once went for a drink after work, wherein my husband picked me up from the bar and he and dude said hey and chatted. That is what it looks like when it's innocent. No secrecy, no clandestine shit. but you did it the right way; your husband knew the guy and you weren't keeping anything from him. this dude was doing god knows what.
BrunetteBella		#183	[-]
Posts: 1465 (06/13/2008 4:39 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I don't blame the wife at all for being upset, ESPECIALLY if it was kept secret from her. Sounds like he had ulterior motives.
Rileyj26		#184	[-]
Posts: 8129 (06/13/2008 4:39 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	dp
Rileyj26		#185	[-]
Posts: 8130 (06/13/2008 4:40 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	QUOTE: whom my husband met and knew all about -- ************************DOES NOT PERTAIN to this poster. This is a different DUCK!
Rileyj26		#186	[-]
Posts: 8130 (06/13/2008 4:40 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	d/p
mshinda		#187	[-]
Posts: 3102 (06/13/2008 4:49 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Rileyj26 wrote: QUOTE: whom my husband met and knew all about -- ************************DOES NOT PERTAIN to this poster. This is a different DUCK! Yes I know and pointed that out at the beginning. I was responding to someone who said hanging out with a married co-worker alone is shady no matter how innocent you try to portray it.
Qrobur		#188	[-]
Posts: 1290 (06/13/2008 4:55 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Bad judgement on his part, a fairly high degree of worry and distrust on her part...and I bet the fact you guessed correctly it was his wife who called you and let him know immediately, whereupon he called her just made it all look even more suspicious. I'm quite sure nobody's actually done anything wrong but, boy, doesn't it look that way.
Leather Tuscadero		#189	[-]
Posts: 2783 (06/13/2008 5:03 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Who else would call and ask if she knew Brian Whatever then hang up real quick? Who is this? Just someone who wants to know how you know him. I mean please!
Rileyj26		#190	[-]
Posts: 8136 (06/13/2008 5:06 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	But it ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS shady if you don't know both parties. I don't get why someone cannot wrap this around their little head. Obviously if a married man is trying to be Mr. Single and is sooooo gung ho about hanging out with someone and wants to pin them down to spend some time with them he shouldn't be married=wife should have a concern.
chickadee0193		#191	[-]
Posts: 3385 (06/13/2008 6:35 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	OP... if I remember correctly, was it you about a year or 2 ago who had a bad breakup with a boyfriend and posted about it on JJB? He cheated on you I think? I remember it being a really long post and checking back a lot to see the outcome.
Sham99		#192	[-]
Posts: 16172 (06/13/2008 6:40 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	You shouldn't be texting a married man. He is not your bf.
theonlysassyone		#193	[-]
Posts: 204 (06/13/2008 7:16 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	I am a married woman, and if i found this stuff out, I would definately be asking him about it first. I WOULD have a problem with my husband hanging out with female co-workers when we don't ever get to go out with the hours he works, I wouldn't be impressed. If he called and said a bunch of us are going for drinks different story, MARRIED MAN= hands off and I am a very trusting wife, btw.
otherindigo		#194	[-]
Posts: 1457 (06/13/2008 7:23 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	perception = reality Now does this mean the perception is true? No, but in that person's mind, it is true. Sometimes it's a hard lesson to learn.
Jillian808		#195	[-]
Posts: 12616 (06/13/2008 7:29 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	When my husband goes out with a co-worker, I know who. I know where, and I sure as hell know he isn't yenta-ing back and forth for 60 texts to get plans straight. I love it! All I gotta say is put yourself in her shoes. If you read those messages and he's was hiding a girl from you, you would probably be on JJB in 2.2 sec cussing his name. It just looks shady on his part. I feel sorry for you that he dragged you into his drama.
Courtney Love1		#196	[-]
Posts: 1116 (06/13/2008 7:50 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Random Sandwiches wrote: The problem is, for every ONE situation where it's innocent (and this seems to be) there are a million others where it isn't. Deep down, she's trying to preserve her marriage. (And I think, personally, it's best that single women just STAY AWAY from married men.) So completely agree. I'm not saying that single people and taken people need to be always seperated, as that's just stupid. Especially when you get to be in your 30s and most people are married; you kinda have no choice but to interact with married people when you're single! HOWEVER, you can't act the same way with a married person as you would with a single person. You just can't. Texting them a lot, making plans to hang out with them solo, etc. just ain't gonna fly. It sucks, I know, when you are single and a guy you like (in a platonic way) is married and you have to be careful of your interactions with him, but that's just the way things are. Go find some SINGLE friends to text a lot and hang out with solo.
henryy83		#197	[-]
Posts: 2853 (06/13/2008 8:00 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	PLURfekt wrote: i'm not a ho! i honestly do not see what the big deal is with going out with a co-worker for some drinks? we have an incredibly stressful job so sometimes it's nice to go out and talk about all the bullshit at work. she's met a lot of people from our work. if we were texting at weird hours of the night or spending hours on the phone then i would think it would be ok to call me and see what is up. BUT we've texted a total of two different occasions. So if your husband was texting a girl and wanting tohang out, you wouldnt be mad??
YellowHairedGirl		#198	[-]
Posts: 702 (06/13/2008 8:16 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	In the OP's defense, I had a good guy friend for about 5 years, who was dating a girl for about the same length of time. They broke up, and she myspace messaged me with all of these questions, asking why he was my #1 friend on myspace (he wasn't even on my top eight), etc. It was completely innocent and platonic and she flipped out over nothing. I think she was LOOKING for something to make into something else. It sounded me to me like that would be what had happened to the OP. I think that this guy may have other intentions, but I think there's a lot more that this couple needs to work out and it's not PLURfekt's fault. Edited By: YellowHairedGirl 06/13/2008 8:22 PM. Edited 1 times.
PuraVidaPanama		#199	[-]
Posts: 9577 (06/13/2008 8:28 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	Going out for drinks with a group of coworkers is no big deal. Constantly texting to arrange your next solo meeting is.
Leather Tuscadero		#200	[-]
Posts: 2789 (06/13/2008 8:39 PM) Reply Quote More Recent Posts Message Friend Block Invite Ignore	PuraVidaPanama wrote: Going out for drinks with a group of coworkers is no big deal. Constantly texting to arrange your next solo meeting is. Well that's not the issue here so it's irrelevant.

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i got a call last night from my co-workers wife

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